Artist impression of Tom McLagenlad during great fire
"In 1666 an Irishman by the name of Tom McLagenlad set fire to Britian. The city of London was burnt down before the fire was put under control. The English were not impressed and decided to leave Ireland alone. Eh everyone in the country celebrated for three weeks, drinking the place dry.
In the meantime, an evil shower of bastards called the Pioneer assoication of Ireland , the only people who did not drink, took control of the nation. For fifty years they ruled a dry nation, forcing horrors such as pitchcappings and radio 1 upon the people.
Finally, a young fenian called Arthur Guinness led a rebellion. Aided by Bulmer Hobson, Daniel Budweiser and Rabbi Irvine Carlsberg, they overthrew the regime and placed Boggy Pervertius the Great on the throne as the new High King of Ireland.
This was a bloody disaster. Eh sure Boggy had been dead for a decade at the time enah nah nahhh! Another pint Sean!"
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